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Dear Chairman Powell,
Dick Cheney's cavalier use of the F-word during a recent exchange on the Senate floor shows that our children are not safe around this man. Vice President Cheney's unwillingness to apologize for his offensive remark and his expressed belief that it was appropriate language to use with a colleague suggests that he may use such dirty words at any time.
I demand protection from his foul mouth and implore you to require that the networks use a 5-second delay for his appearance during the Vice Presidential debate and his address at the Republican National Convention. Having watched your vigorous pursuit of those who seek to pollute our public discourse with vile language and inappropriate displays of various body parts, I'm sure you will seek to protect us from this man's malodorous mouth.
For the Children,
[insert your (Christian) name here]